"Let a student* who has not violated his vows of Brahmachaarya(student-life), and has conducted himself, righteously according to the advice of his preceptor, enter married life after he has studied with their subsidiary sciences, the four Vedaas, three Vedas, two Vedas, or one Veda only." MANU 3: 2.
"Let him, who has faithfully discharged his duties towards his preceptor and received from his father, - natural or spiritual (i.e., the teacher), the gift of the knowledge of the Veda, sit on an elegant bed, decked with a garland of flowers; and let his father ( natural or spiritual) honor him with the present of a cow." MANU 3: 3. A female student possessed of the aforesaid qualification should also be honored in the same way by her father.
"Let a twice-born man (Braahman, Kshatriya, and Vaish) after having obtained the consent of his teacher and taken the bath ( prescribed for the ceremony of Return Home from the seminary), return home and espouse a maid, of his own Class, endowed with excellent qualities." MANU 3: 4.
*Male or female
"A girl, who is not descended on his mother's side within the sixth degree and does not bear the same family name (Gotra) as his father's. is eligible for marriage." MANU 3: 5.
It is a fact that "we do not love or value a thing, that we are familiar with, so much as one that is hidden from our view." SHATHAPATHA BRAAHMANA. For instance, if a person has heard a great deal about the sweetness of sugar, but never tasted it, his mind is taken up with the desire of tasting it. Or when we hear a person, who is not known to us, highly extolled for his excellent qualities, it makes us very eager to make his acquaintance. For the same reason, a man should marry a girl, who comes from a distant country and is not a near relative either on his mother's side or father's side.*
The advantages and disadvantages of distant and near marriages
The advantages and disadvantages of distant and near marriages respectively are:-
Any two persons who have, in their childhood, lived near each other, played and quarreled together, loved one another, noticed each other's faults, imperfections, ebullitions of temper
*At Washington city before the National Medical Association long since in the session there, Dr. S.M. Bewis made the following shocking statement: "My researches give me authority to say that over ten per cent of the deaf and dumb, and over five percent of the blind , and nearly fifteen percent of the idiotic in our State institutions for subject of these effects, are the offspring of kindred parents."
and misbehaviors, and perhaps sometimes, even each other undressed, if married to each other, can never love each other to the extent desired.
The marriage of near relatives does not improve the race from want of interchange of fluids and essences (such as blood) of the body, it rather deteriorates it,. This is analogous to the addition of water to water, no new quality being produced.
As the addition of sugar and such medicines as ginger, improves the taste and quality of milk, so does the marriage of people, who are not related to each other (either on father's or on mother's side), improve the race.
As in the case of an invalid, change of climate and diet very often effects a cure, so does marriage with foreigners or distant people improve the health of the parties and prove beneficial in every other respect.
When the parties are nearly related to each other and live amongst their people, the sorrows and joys of one family will
affect the other and there will be many occasions for family disputes to arise; while marriages among distant people and consequent separation from relatives lengthen the thread of mutual love. This is not the case when they live near their people.
When marriages are contracted with people of foreign or distant countries, things and news from those countries can be easily obtained (and consequently relations between different countries become closely established). This not possible when people marry near relatives or persons living near their homes, or, in their own country.
In Sanskrit a daughter is called duhitri (from Du - distant, Hit - good), because the marriage of a girl to a man who comes from a distant country or distant part of the same country is productive of good.
If the bride's people do not live very far from her husband's home, there is a possibility of her parents becoming poor, as whenever she visits her parents, they will have to give her something or other by the way of a present. If their people live near at hand, on any slight friction taking place between the husband and the wife, she, feeling assured that her people will support her, will at once leave her husband and go to her parents. That may become the cause of mutual reviling and wrangling, for, women, as a rule, are so easily offended and pleased.
“ARYA SAMAJ MANDIR”
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GUJARAT(INDIA) ,
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